Who’s on first?
Timing is everything. You really need a financial expert like me—after all, I’m a CPA, a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER® professional, and a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst® professional—to look at that proposed settlement before you go to mediation.
Better yet: You should have me bless it before you send it over to the other side!
This is where timing—and the order of the different steps—comes into play.
Many times, it’s the husband’s side that creates the first settlement offer in a divorce. The wife then counters.
Why is that? I think that women generally prefer to have the other side draft the initial settlement to save money on attorneys’ fees.
But that stance puts them—and you—in a bind. It makes you reactive instead of proactive. Rather than controlling the language, you’re trying to fix the language. You’re playing catch-up from the get-go.
If you start in the other direction—with the wife taking first crack at the settlement agreement—you (and she) get to decide the starting points. It’s a classic negotiating game, in which you have the initiative, and thus the upper hand. If you want X, you can, say, ask for 2X, so you can settle.
Incidentally, as the financial pro in this scenario, I can advise on arcane and thorny issues such as pension distributions, tax implications, and projected future income to support, say, a lifestyle consideration for spousal maintenance.
In a perfect world, then, the wife goes first.
But we don’t live in a perfect world. We live in the real world. I get it. I live here, too.
Still, there are ways to play this game to your—and your client’s—advantage, with my help. Example: I recently worked with an attorney who knew that the husband would be submitting the initial settlement draft. So, she had me work up a bunch of if/then scenarios, in advance:
If he wants the real estate, we’ll counter with X. If he wants the pension, we’ll counter with Y.
Granted, it’s kind of a kluge, but the attorney was delighted. She hadn’t gone into battle with this kind of armament before. And so she felt both liberated and empowered. She’s a big Bridge Divorce Strategies fan, now, and I’m happy to help her going forward.
I can help you, too. Regardless of who tosses out the first pitch. Contact me and let’s have a mutually beneficial get-to-know-you call.
AFI service
Seeing how often improperly-completed AFIs can frustrate attorneys like you, I’ve created an all-new service: I’ll help your divorcing-women clients complete their AFI, within one week of getting the supporting documents (bank and credit-card statements, etc.). And I’ll do it for them for a flat fee of just $495.
So they—and you—will have a good, solid AFI that opposing counsel can’t poke holes in, for a flat fee, in fast time.
Contact me today to get started!
